You're mad at yourself all the time

You might feel like you need to be your own drill sergeant. But being hard on yourself can lead to a cycle of negativity: You're waiting for slipups and punishing yourself for them. Then you end up feeling like a failure, and give up on making positive changes.

Here's what the research shows: Negative self-talk doesn't help you reach your goals — and can actually hurt you. You need to give yourself some kindness to break the pattern.

Try this: Be on your own team. You're trying to figure out what helps you make healthy choices. Without judgment. Notice when you brain says "You're not good at this," or "You're probably going to fail." Talk to yourself like you would talk to a friend. Try "I'm working to make a change, I'm learning and I'm being good to myself."

It might seem counterintuitive, but accepting yourself, flaws and all, can actually make you more ready for healthy change.